I felt like absolute rubbish last night. I was exhausted. I'd been falling asleep all day. I have been staying up until 1 in the morning playing Facebook games and watching the new channel 11. OMG, I love the shows they have on there. staying up so late watching them is a bad, bad thing!
Just before Christmas I was collateral damage from a small family tiff. A couple of rellies removed me from their friends list on Facebook. One put me back on before new years, the other didn't. At that stage I didn't care, I don't particularly like this person anyway.
I noticed last night she's been adding rellies back onto her Facebook. I have obviously lost the plot because I was upset that she didn't add me!! That was the point that I realised I'm not doing to well at the moment. I am also convinced that one of my friends doesn't like me any more. I must have done something wrong. I always do. I haven't asked her, but we haven't seen each other much in the last couple of weeks, so it's of course my fault!
So lack of sleep, irratic medication, a feeling of being out of control, I'm feeling pretty miserable at the moment.
I have removed almost all the Facebook games again. I have become a Facebook Zombie. My poor kids have missed out on a lot of time with me. It's not fair on them. My house is constantly a bomb site, but I have been able to pretend it doesn't exist because I just keep my eyes on the computer monitor. Time to come out of the coma and start living again.
I was in bed about 2 hours earlier last night. I woke up about 15 minutes before the alarm went off this morning. I feel better if I wake up on my own rather than get woken up. My girls are the same. I hate waking them up, it's much better if they wake themselves up.
So, small changes, hopefully I'll be out of the fog soon. I've managed to stay smoke free, although that's taken a lot of strength and distraction. Hmmm... one addiction for another. Why can't I become addicted to exercise and salad??
Til next time,